Uncategorized

coming out 2019

At the age of 12, I tried to slit my wrists with a disposable razor. It was right around the time I started my first period. That was the first of many suicide attempts in my life. Every few years I would end up at the bottom of the same spiral. After each attempt, I woke up with dread and called my mom crying.

Now, 43 years old, I am disabled by mental illness. I know now that I am full-fledged crazy. The kind of crazy that makes people homeless and happier outside than stuck in a studio apartment alone. I don’t know what happened for about 4 years of my adult life. I was psychotic, experiencing auditory hallucinations but not comprehending that this is what was happening, and on the cycle of a brain with a mood disorder.

For the last three years I have been stable on medication with no symptoms of mental illness. I looked for a part-time job for a couple of months when I realized I wanted to go back to my own skill set, my talent, my heart’s work: craniosacral therapy. Meeting people now and marketing my private practice, I’ve been embarrassed or awkward when asked what I’ve been doing for the past ten years. That is the catalyst for my decision to come out as mentally ill. Mental illness is in the news so much right now and at the center of great debates. There is so much press, much needed, about gun control in the aftermath of mass shootings.

My last suicide attempt occurred when I was 24 years old. Craniosacral therapy healed me a great deal. My illness is serious enough, and was progressing, that I will have to be on psychiatric medications for the rest of my life. But craniosacral therapy continues to release trauma and restrictions in my tissues, freeing my body to move easier and my mind to relax.

For information about my practice in Palm Beach County, Florida, visit ladybug4852.com. For information about CranioSacral Therapy internationally, visit upledger.com.

 

Uncategorized

fasciae (how it works)

A fascia (/ˈfæʃ(i)ə/; plural fasciae /ˈfæʃii/; adjective fascial; from Latin: “band”) is a band or sheet of connective tissue, primarily collagen, beneath the skin that attaches, stabilizes, encloses, and separates muscles and other internal organs.


Everything in our body has a layer of connective tissue, or fasciae, wrapped around it. Everything is connected, quite literally. Fascia wraps around every layer of muscle. For example, when a craniosacral therapist manipulates fascia in the dura mater surrounding the cervical spine, it connects to the tissue surrounding tendons, muscles, organs, and our brain. The meninges are the three layers of fasciae that encase the brain. The dura mater, to toughest outer layer gets restrictions in the form of scar tissue that pull on muscular fasciae, creating tightness. The arachnoid mater, the middle layer is spread like cobwebs throughout the cerebrospinal fluid. The pia mater, the innermost layer, is thin and lines every cravice of our brain.

When you are rear-ended in a car crash and get whiplash, your dura mater, fascia around your cervical spine and brain stem think, “Oh no, if we have to deal with this kind of force now, we’re going to need to become stronger.” The cells produce more elastin and less collagen, which makes them more rigid. That rigidity then strains the vertebrae and other structures in the body. This is what we mean by “tension.” Trauma, physical, psychological, or spiritual trauma creates tension. Craniosacral therapy bodywork relieves tension.

 

Uncategorized

Are you just starting this?

I’ve been focused on growing my practice for about a year now. I met someone at the Compass Pride Business Social recently who asked if I am new to craniosacral therapy. I explained that my trainings were from 2002-2005. (I am registered for the Advanced I training in 2020.) He asked me what has been happening since my trainings.

I fumbled for words and didn’t know how to explain. I live my truth with a commitment to personal and spiritual growth, so here it is.

I practiced craniosacral therapy in Portland, Oregon from 2004 – 2009. My wife and I tried to have a baby and instead I ended up with a hysterectomy. That triggered a healing crisis that disabled me and I stopped working completely. A few years later my wife, unexpectedly, divorced me. I moved back home to south Florida to the support of my family. As I told the gentleman who asked the question, I had some personal time off.

I am now healthy enough to return to work part-time and this is my process. Thank you for your support, in every way. I pray I can be productive and successful doing something I love.

Uncategorized

SomatoEmotional Release (SER)

A method of SomatoEmotional Release (SER) is included in the CranioSacral Therapy (CST) playbook. The basic principle is that we have emotional energy stuck in the soma, or muscle and soft tissue. When the emotion releases, it often has to be felt in the process. As the emotion releases from the body, other energy from the original trauma, or injury, is released with it.

Dialoguing is used to explore, discover, and resolve the emotion connected to the trauma or energy. When trauma, an impact – either physical, or energetic, enters into the tissue, the body dissipates as much as possible. Often when an emotion is involved, the trauma seems to be more difficult to dissipate. What the body cannot resolve itself is walled off into energy cysts.

Uncategorized

just me thinking

I love the voices, the thought patterns, the routine rumination. I finally am willing to concede to the idea that it’s not in my best interest. It makes me less competent. Sobriety keeps me sharp, untwisted. One keeps me lifted and the other allows me to relax deeply. There’s a time and a place for everything, so why not moderate? It’s an obvious solution and my lack of ability to achieve it as a goal has been obvious for a couple of years now.